The change

Standing at the threshold of life, one day dying and another beginning; I’m comtemplating how you have changed me. I would have  never imagined I would see 70 years of life. As I stand looking at my reflection in the mirror I ponder how fast time has passed, asking myself the question,” is this what 70 is suppose to look like?”.

I’m amazed at how God has kept me viable, has given me control of self by allowing him total control of me. Everything my eyes behold reminds me of his majasty, love,compassion and forgiveness.  The sun as it kisses my skin, the wind  blowing through my hair, the smell of flowers in the spring and the gentleness of a spring rain.

The joy of life serging through my veins, my heart pumping with enthusiasm and love permeating every fiber of my being. I’m so grateful for all the darkness your love removed from my life. Darkness so thick I couldn’t see any light. My eyes cluttered with sin no light could enter. Sinking into eternal damnation not realizing I was truly lost, then you whispered in my ears “there is a better way.”

I didn’t recognize your voice for it is soft & gentle and my ears were filled with life’s distractions. Thank you for pursuing me not giving up the quest to capture my heart. You never left my side though there were times I didn’t realize you were there. Your sweet voice continued to whisper in my ears ” I love you.” The years have come and gone, I have experienced  many wonderful days wrapped in your loving arms.

Each day a new adventure, the storms don’t frighten me the way they once did, I’m constantly reminded you are never far from me, that what matters to me also matters to you, and you will always listen to my concerns.  Though much time has passed it has not always been without stress, pain, or worry. Many tears I’ve shed over loss of loved ones, dying friendships, bad decisions that hurt those I held dear to my heart.

Mistakes I’ve made, my unwillingness to forgive when I had the opportunity, and most important my failure to see my need for you in my life sooner. As a child I was programmed to do all the things that would say to the world you were important to me, but i never knew you. It was just a story that happened long before I was thought of or so I thought.

As I look back today I know for certain the story is true, the sacrifice of blood was real and you will come again. Because of the change you have made in my life, life is worth the living.

My revelation as I sit by the pool of grace.

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